Maybe I should just say, I need a better plan.
Okay, okay. I just need a plan. A plan for the morning. I don’t have one. Well – wait – unless you count the one about boiling the water for my morning French-pressed wake up elixir. Straight up. Black. Strong.
Yeah, I should have more of a plan than –
Don’t burn mouth.
After I get the coffee down, it’s pretty much haphazard. What does haphazard actually mean, anyway?
happening or done in a way that has not been planned
synonyms include: random, hit-or-miss, slapdash, jumbled, careless, irregular,
all over the place (haha – very funny)
Ouch. Guilty as charged. And sorry I asked.
You know, I used to be an organized person. When the kiddos were young and still at home, it seems I accomplished so much more. And I know I had a plan for each and every day. What happened?
Little by little, I got comfortable. Life got easier in many ways. And I got – dare I say it? – lazy.
Why is it that as the kids got older and either left home or got self-sufficient, not requiring as much from me, I got lazy?
I can even remember realizing a few years ago the privileged season of more time to myself quickly approaching. I looked forward to it and thought about how much I’d be able to accomplish. But I didn’t make a plan.
I was soon to arrive at every mom’s Promised Land.
The Promised Land which flowed with children sleeping through the night, waking and getting their own breakfast, doing their school and chores without too much prodding. Children who didn’t need a babysitter. Children who could safely drive themselves to events or work. Children who didn’t care anymore if I left the house without them.
I am a mom who has practically worked herself out of a job.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not sad about this in any way, shape, or form. It’s the way is supposed to be. We raise our kids so they can be godly, self-sufficient, productive members of society, and able to move out of the house.
But I forgot to remember how I came to be in this place of privilege. Reminds me of something I read somewhere….
Deuteronomy 8:7-18 (NLT)
For the Lord your God is bringing you into a good land
of flowing streams and pools of water, with fountains and springs that gush out in the valleys and hills.
It is a land of wheat and barley; of grapevines, fig trees, and pomegranates; of olive oil and honey.
It is a land where food is plentiful and nothing is lacking.
It is a land where iron is as common as stone, and copper is abundant in the hills.
When you have eaten your fill,
be sure to praise the Lord your God for the good land he has given you.
But that is the time to be careful!
Beware that in your plenty you do not forget the Lord your God
and disobey his commands, regulations, and decrees that I am giving you today.
For when you have become full and prosperous
and have built fine homes to live in, and when your flocks and herds have become very large and your silver and gold have multiplied along with everything else,
Do not become proud at that time and forget the Lord your God, who rescued you
from slavery in the land of Egypt.
Do not forget that he led you through the great and terrifying wilderness
with its poisonous snakes and scorpions, where it was so hot and dry.
He gave you water
from the rock!
He fed you
with manna in the wilderness, a food unknown to your ancestors.
He did this to humble you and test you for your own good.
He did all this so you would never say to yourself,
‘I have achieved this wealth with my own strength and energy.’
Remember the Lord your God.
He is the one who gives you power to be successful,
in order to fulfill the covenant he confirmed to your ancestors with an oath.
Forgive me, Father. I forgot. I forgot that You sustained me when I was sleep deprived. I forgot that You gave me wisdom when I had no clue how to discipline those kids. I forgot that You taught me how to teach them. I forgot that You provided when the bank account was slim. I forgot that You kept me calm when they struggled with their faith. I forgot that You protected us from ourselves. I was never hungry or without clothes or shelter. I was never alone.
So, here I am, Friends. January 2, 2014 and I need a plan.
I haven’t been into New Year’s Resolutions for some time now, preferring to make goals. I have to admit, though, that I’m kind of afraid of making goals. Well, I take that back. I’m not afraid to make goals. I’m afraid of failing at the goals I make.
Oh my gosh – all of a sudden I’m wondering what I’m doing? Writing all this, knowing I’m going to hit the “Publish” button pretty soon and I’ve bared my soul. Now you all know that Calista’s only definite plan for the day is to get up, make the coffee, and drink it. After that, it’s hit-or-miss.
Well, I will hit “Publish” and I want you to know I’ve written in first person on purpose, because this is my problem, not yours. This morning I am only preaching to myself.
I hope it encourages you.
I am thankful for God’s Word and specifically Deuteronomy 8:7-18 (NLT) today. Did you catch all the provisions of God?
A good land
Flowing streams, fountains of water, gushing springs
Lacking nothing, being filled
Having been rescued
Led through the great and terrifying wilderness
(come on now, can anyone else relate here?)
He gave you water
He fed you
He gives you power to be successful
I am undone by the goodness of our God.
And I am finished wasting my time.
I’m getting a plan.